“เพื่อนรัก (Dear Friend)” by The Parkinson

Before I left the Philippines, I started listening to Pimsleur’s Learn to Speak Thai. It took me a few months to finish even the first lesson, because I was psyching myself out that Thai is a tonal language and therefore difficult. It’s almost like all the vowels are somewhere on their way to being dipththongs but not quite there, and the glottal consonants are all blended, and the plosives are all blended too. Thai has a very distinct sound that most foreigners, certainly myself included, can’t seem to imitate well.

Once I fully committed and got into the Pimsleur’s Thai though, it was a lot easier. Now when I try speaking a few phrases here and there, people say my Thai accent is pretty good. Mostly foreigners have said that though (hehe), but they’re the ones that have been in Thailand a long time, and are also married to Thais, so I’ll take the feedback. I still have a long way to go to be more comfortable with speaking Thai, but I’m going to be here a long time so that’s fine.

Since I arrived in Bangkok, I’ve made an effort to watch Thai TV channels. I have no clue what anyone is saying, but it does help in terms of getting familiar with how the Thai language sounds. I especially like the channels where they show Buddhist monks chanting and performing religious ceremonies in temples. I also spend time on the music channels, because I believe that listening to and singing music from a language you’re learning helps a lot. Last night I heard this song start, and I thought hmmm, sounds really smooth. Then I started watching the video, and, well, I’ll let you see it for yourself.

I didn’t catch the first part of the video, so at first I was like oh cool, it’s a lesbian love story. Romi would like this. The Thai culture is very open to the LGBT community, and I’ve seen commercials and even primetime TV shows that are centered around LGBT themes, so I thought it was nice to see an LGBT story in a music video. Then I watched the video a bit more, and towards the end I was like why is she trying to flatten her boobs? Did she fall in love with her friend so much that she wanted to transition to being a man? Luckily I found Deungdutjai’s blog for the explanation of what actually happens in the video.

The focus of The Parkinson’s “เพื่อนรัก (Dear Friend)” video is a male-to-female pre-operation transgender who is best friends with a girl. In the process of her transition, she realizes that she’s falling in love with her best friend. Her best friend is straight and seems to be starting a relationship with a boy. The transwoman’s feelings grow stronger and stronger for her best friend, and she has a moment after her sex reassignment surgery where she regrets completing the transition. By the end, she kisses her best friend, and the music ends on a cliffhanger.

I had mixed feelings about the theme of the video once I fully understood what was going on. Personally, I get irritated and borderline offended when people suggest that maybe if I found the right girl I wouldn’t want to be gay. I also think anyone involved in or believes in gay conversion therapy is out-of-this-world crazier than the people they think they are trying to help. I was worried that this video could be used to support that insane and totally incorrect idea that you can choose the gender of the people you are attracted to. Love is love, and it isn’t something you choose to happen. It just does. I finally calmed down when I saw at the end of the video that the transwoman kissed her best friend while wearing pretty women’s clothes that emphasized her new female form. To me, that meant that she came to accept who she was, and was hopeful that her best friend would accept who she was now too.

The music video is really thought-provoking. It’s almost like a mini indie flick. You can really feel the internal conflict that the transwoman is going through. I feel grateful they decided to show her eventual acceptance of who she really was, even if we are unsure if her best friend would accept her too. I love how they cast an actual transwoman as well. That’s something we don’t see too often in music videos. Video aside, the music is really beautiful too. The Parkinson is almost like a Thai version of South Border, falsettos and all. This song and its video have made me even more committed to learn Thai.